This just in from IOS reader Jamie Croft, former Talent Acquisition Recruiter, semi stay-at home mom here in the States to a three year old boy and just getting her feet wet back into her career. She dishes to In Our Shoes on the dirty little secret women like her who used to be somebodies in the working world don’t talk about.

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‘To be honest my son is almost 3 and I am feeling so bored. I HATE play groups and playdates, I am over it and could care less about the BS stay at home moms talk about. I guess it depends on the moms but in my area it’s hard to find good ones. Is that mean? My son is getting so independent now, I find after he gets up from his nap, he plays by himself and I feel kind of useless. He plays with his puzzles and trains and sometimes asks for me but not half as much as he used to. ‘

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Jaime has started to pick back up her recruiting career part-time while at home. In Our Shoes asked how she feels getting back on the work saddle.

‘Its not about the money right now but to get my mind going!’

‘I LOVE being frazzled and emailing and talking on the phone and texting all at once to my candidates and clients. I miss recruiting and that high I get when I land people jobs. Now, I’m just making sure it works with my son’s schedule. So far so good!’

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We hear you Jaime. Women rock at multi-tasking and why (sshhhh, you didn’t hear it from me) we really are the superior sex.  Thanks for sounding off to us, no judgement calls here. Feels good doesn’t it? 

Readers: Have something to sound off about? Get in touch! Anonymity is welcomed here.

Subscribe Today.  

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Up next…full interview with Danielle Curzon the British royal who waved bye bye to the aristocracy and is a work mum just like the rest of us juggling it all only as the UK’s first female referree for the MMA (Mixed Martial Arts – I didn’t know what that stood for either!)

You asked, In Our Shoes delivered!  Dear readers, the new “Hot Spots” link is now available on tab above. These are the shortcuts to the most popular post footprints at In Our Shoes. Smuggled here are the tactical tools, solutions and wisdom found here and from my guest column in London’s Here is the City global financial news. Enjoy!

 

Most Popular Sole Spots

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Career You

• Killer Negotiation Strategies for Women.

• Sexy Soft Skills: Why Charm will get you everywhere.

• Hush-Hush: Going Silent at the Bargaining table.

• Let it Rip!: Four Steps to Succeeding at anything.

• One Shot to Nailing your 2 Minute Commercial in Today’s Job Market.

• Gems of Advice from America’s NAFE power women.

• Risky Business: Risk nothing, Gain nothing.

• Morsels of Career Wisdom from New York University.

• This is how they’ll do it: UK Work Mums Juggling it All.

• Brit Maternity Leave: Blessing or Curse?

• The article that ruffled some mens’ feathers – (I was not serious!).

Adventurous You

• Meetup Madness: Get online to Create Change (offline).

• Find your Female Village: Why ‘Collecting’ Women is a must.

• Linking in Girl Style.

• Free Fall into a Radical Pair of New Shoes.

• Trekking to Great Britain: How I ‘pick up’ inspiring women on the road.

• Princess for a Day: Hanging with the Royals in a Castle.

Beautiful You

• Hey Beautiful. Let’s Celebrate.

• Hot Pockets: Strut your Confidence in the Office.

• Get inspired. Create your ‘This much I know’ Creed.

• Celebrate your Sweet Successes (even the teensy ones).

Mommy You

• The SuperMom Myth – Forget it, you can’t do it all.

• Mirror Mirror: American Girl or My London Girl Doll?

• Need a Mommy Time out? Go ahead, Run!

• Lose your brain for a day.

• Living a Life without Regret.

• Find your out when Doing it ALL.

• Six Bizarre Things every New Mom should know.

• Your Road Less traveled: Carving a Life from Magic Mold.

• How do you keep all engines firing? Here’s my secret.

• Forget perfect, Start Peeling your Onion.

• Be your Biggest Fan First!

Featured Movers and Shakers

• Meet a Female Rainmaker.

• Meet a British Royal and Unconventional Work mum.

• Meet a British Transplant and NY Success Story.

• Meet a Fashion Designer.

• Meet a Trail Blazer and Cancer Survivor.

• Inside the home of an International Acclaimed Artist.

Recommends

• Half a Wife: If you’re only 1/2 there ALL of the time (UK).

• Eat. Pray. Love.

 

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 Dear readers, it’s here! The Audio replay from the Sabotage Tele-Seminar hosted here on In Our Shoes. See below for your listening pleasure!

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Thanks to everyone who dialed in.  It was yet another empowering conversation on the topic of

How Women Sabotage themselves in Business

Before we start the next work week, I’d like to share a quote from French chef Michel Roux Jr. found in my favorite section of the Guardian: This much I know.

“The chaos of the kitchen is almost peaceful. When I am in the middle of a service, I am so focused. There is nothing else on my mind apart from the food in front of me. ” - Michel Roux Jr.

I’m a big fan of this section. I get high on collecting morsels of wisdom and intriguing facts from people. They don’t need to necessarily be famous. Recently when rushing to catch an early morning flight for business,I had the most fantastic conversation with my taxi driver, soaking in all of his lessons learned as a father while his wife worked full-time escaping the mommy shoes. My morning had started off crazed and yet this semi-retired complete stranger had me hanging on every word.

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When reading the above quote from Chef Michel, it reminded me of the chaos of the working mother’s life juggling the work-life balance thing with shoe swapping success. Running a kitchen is no small feat when you think of all the moving parts involved and the time sensitivity in delivering to hungry clients.  A chef is also one of the few esteemed artist professions given its stable and high income earning potential despite the sharp critic personality prerequisite  - their perfectionist gene.

 

Is chaos essential? I believe it is. It’s the yin and the yang of life. It pushes us. It sets us straight and forces us to consider what we want to do when we grow up.

If you are living a life you don’t love, find your passion; find your CHAOS.

Slip into a new pair of shoes and find what it is that you love to do. A must-have key ingredient á la chef Michel just in case you aren’t sure: 

you must be knee deep in chaos, loving every minute of it.

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Pssst, Chef Michel runs one of the few restaurants (Le Gavroche in London serving classical French fare) that mentors students straight out of culinary school. Sound familiar readers? One more reason we have fallen for you here Chef Michel. You are a man who believes in starting from the ground up to inspire people in their career - true In Our Shoes spirit. Read the full interview on “This much I know” from Chef Michel Roux Jr.

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If that doesn’ t move you, here’s a little inspiration from your Shoe Hostess and her budding little chef (someone needs to do the cooking around here!)  Don’t fight it dear readers, chaos is in fact very essential  indeed!

 

 

In Our Shoes is seeking interviews with women in careers traditionally reserved for men. If you know of an inspiring woman chef , we would love to meet her! Location is never an issue – US or Europe.

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“We’re never gonna survive, unless we get a little crazy” - Seal: “Crazy”

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Have you spread the word and subscribed to In Our Shoes?

Companion “First Footprint” from In Our Shoes column in Here is the City News.

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This summer In Our Shoes delivers an empowering seminar program for women offered in New York and London: the “Dream Shoe” Seminar!

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I leave you here with the first of a 5 part free audio series unveiling the:

 

5 Footprints which Smart Ambitious Women make when following their Passion in Business!

 

Play- 17 minutes

 

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Interviewing successful women entrepreneurs and consulting with women who have worked in corporate most of their career lives or who have stepped out of the workplace for a few years after having children and wish to re-enter, inspired this Dream Shoe seminar last year, addressing the below questions I am asked all of the time as they are considering the next stage of their careers.  Share your story in the following pre-seminar registration Profile Sheet and then explore what the Dream Shoe Seminar is all about. We hope to meet you in person! In the meantime, enjoy these 5 footprints of what working women really want out of life: to follow a career they are passionate about!

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• Am I good enough? I’ve worked in corporate my whole life, dream shoes are just that – a big dream.
• How can I reinvent myself pursuing a career I love when I have only worked for other people?
• I have no official employment experience on paper, only an interest in XYZ business, how can I transition to a new career?
• I am a single parent and main breadwinner, how can I take a risk and start something new?

These questions and more will be addressed in this 5 part seminar and serve as a preview of the in-person Dream Shoe Seminar made available this year. I hope you enjoy this First Footprint sound byte and return back for more inspiring solutions to jumpstart you to the next stage of your career!

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Place your comments and questions below. We can follow up with a tele-conference seminar again where we can continue the conversation on how Smart Ambitious women follow their Passions in Business!

Psssst, have you subscribed to In Our Shoes? Media share buttons sit below for you to pass it on!

 

Negotiating. You do it in your sleep.

We underestimate the deals we’re cutting around town. We bargain with car dealers,  when pushing for the next raise; we’re cutting deals  with our munchkins at every breakfast sit down before school. I myself was caught in the act over the holidays with a pretzel vendor in New York’s Rockefeller Center.  The same toasty pretzel I normally fork out 1 dollar for in an average NY minute, suddenly sky rocketed to $4 during Manhattan’s tourist trap season.

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But I’m not here to talk about overpriced pretzels in New York’s concrete jungle.  As your Shoe Hostess I’m here to talk about a strategy you can use the next time you sit down at the bargaining table with someone. This is no longer considered men’s territory, women strike winning deals too.

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The power of silence.

It’s not exactly something Americans swing easily. It takes alot to stifle us in general but going silent for several seconds during a a one-on-one negotiation can work wonders for your bargaining power. For one thing, it allows you to create space (an impromptu pregnant pause if you will) between you and the other person when the discussion is getting dicey.

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Granted, it absolutely feels awkward and doesn’t come naturally for women.

We’re programmed with an aim to please and are averse to making waves. Heaven forbid we’re perceived as being difficult in a given situation. Taking a step back and suddenly going hush during a free flowing healthy conversation takes some practice but can spark some pretty powerful wins.

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Going silent signals that you are in control and stand behind what you’re proposing. It’s a chess move that can prompt the other person to opening up with more information than they had initially planned on sharing. They could also change course by taking a different position or better yet get a closer view of what it’s like in your shoes. The good news? Any one of these motions puts you in a better position.

So don’t sweat it, silence is a good thing.

Going mum will always buy you more time especially if the terms have navigated down territory which risk your coming to a satisfying agreement in the end. More negotiation tactics in my column here for London’s Here is the City, but for now I shush and that’s all you’re going to hear from me.

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Subscribe here.

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Am I a bad mommy? It’s crossed my mind before.

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The question rears its head again as I find myself  amongst the stay at home mommy’s who share their daughter’s coming out American Girl doll experience. It’s the pilgramage parents make across major cities in the US: a visit to the celebrity doll store.  I used to think it was an American thing, the race to scoop up the latest trendy goods for our children. Forget the steep price tag, only the best for princess.

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Sadly, I learned our mother ship is no better. 

The shopping bug has stung the UK as well I’m afraid.

Yes, the My London Girl doll shop swung open its doors late last year in our favorite English city.

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For those not in the know, these dolls are selected based on the physical likeness of the lucky little girl that calls it its own. We’re talking the same hair style and color, eyes, skin tone and yes even down to dress up and personal fashion statements dear readers.

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Still I hold the line. My six year old has yet to comb the matching auburn tresses of her American mini-me doll. 

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The chats I have with stay at home moms on those rare playdates I have time for, often veer into the haves and have nots of our children. There’s not much wiggle room for me (the now and again black sheep) to pipe up and say that I can smell the marketing ploys of these capitalizing toy makers.

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Parents take the forbidden bite that sells. The secret to building confidence in our little girls lies simply in their “mirror mirror on the wall“.  Sorry, but the fixation on the whole matching mini-me thing kind of wigs me out plus I don’t really get it. Don’t we want our kids to appreciate beauty in all of the skin and hair palettes which paint the world’s landscape?

American Girl’s  “follow your inner star” mantra seems a bit twisted given the beauty myth they’re selling,

not to mention conflicting for parents if teaching your child that beauty is only skin deep.

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On to more important matters. I have a bone to pick with  Thomas the Train whom little girls also love to play with. 

When oh when will a splendid pink engine be added to the steam team to prove her railway worthiness? 

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Sir Topham Hat: are you listening?

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“It’s imperative to put our talents to good use—and not to contribute to more meaningless shit out in the world.”

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This just chirped over twitter from the CEO of UK branding agency Wolff Olins. These guys are the same ones who drove the RED Campaign (very cool) and scored the contract to design this summer’s Olympics logo.

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These words got me thinkin’. Mister CEO (Karl Heiselman) went on to say that as a firm they are all about branding first and foremost.  Yet at its purest form Wolff Olins’ identity is shaped by standing behind socially responsible projects that they “encourage” their clients to commit to if they sign on with them.

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In other words, they’ll  think twice before taking on a client if they don’t agree to stomp a footprint into the world which makes a “relevant social impact.”

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Whoa. Now that’s inspiring. You’re toying with the purse strings now W.O.;  We like how you roll. .

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This message resonates here at In Our Shoes and should be with anyone caught in the act of doing in this life.

Do what you love, we’re told at a young age. Follow your dreams, we tell our children.

I do it everyday when I run home to bring you the latest scoop from women’s events or scribing up interviews and tips to share. My writing is at my core. Still I don’t write for the sake of writing.  I write to inspire change in women, hard working women who are strung out on juggling all of the balls thrown at them day in and day out.

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So yes do what you love, but while making a small dent and becoming  ”a force for improvement” in this world.

Why thank you Wolff Olins for tweeting us that message at week’s end. I’m quite sure that if a parenting magazine landed your interview, you would have added that it all starts with moms and mums shaping the world in the first place.

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Back in the day when I was very green inching up in Corporate America, if someone gave me a compliment on my hair, dress or some deliverable I had churned out with my best sweated effort, most times I felt awkward and pretty antsy about taking the godforsaken compliment. I’m sure there are plenty of psychology books out there oozing with explanation on this reaction from women (versus men). The act of shoo-ing away praise that is.

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But as your Shoe Hostess, I’m not here to tell you why we women think and do these bizarre things.  I’m here to say. Nay, I’m here to shout that 

if someone gives me a compliment today I’ll straighten up, look them square on and say: “thank you“.

I may also follow it up with a brief nod of acceptance. Work it like the Queen would as she looks on into the crowd approvingly.

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With that said dear readers, I share some In Our Shoes news. I’ve received word today from the editors of BlogHer.  

I’m proud to shout out that I’ve been featured on their What’s hot section of BlogHer’s Career channel this week for my posts on Soft Skills bringing Sexy back and  One Shot at Resume/CV success. So if you’ve missed them last month, be sure to take a peek and thank you, BlogHer!

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It’s the 12th day of the year. Have you celebrated your sweet successes yet?   Do share at Marisa@InRShoes.com and I’ll shout it out and link back to you here on In Our Shoes!  It’s time.

It’s time for you to take a bow.

A bit of inspiration I picked up when visiting the British Library in London  from the man who brought us Sherlock Holmes:

“I am tending my little literary sprouts and making them into cabbages” – Arthur Conan Doyle in a letter to his mother regarding the progress he’s made as a writer.   

 

 

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I’m a big believer that the positive energy between people is intentional and something which we attract precisely when we need that extra umppphh in our lives. I immediately felt a connection towards Jeanne Peterson when we met in her London office last November. She emitted that hit-the-ground-running energy which any working woman recognizes only too well. You know the kind where we’re buzzing about our business with a killer smile that speaks: “Small talk over, let’s get to work!”  I had found a little bit of Manhattan in this woman and I was lovin’ it.  

 

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Jeanne Peterson has broken all barriers when it comes to realizing the personal and professional life she wanted. Read on for her powerful interview where she dishes on how

hitting the glass ceiling early on in her career ignited her to “throw away the paradigm“

and start living by her own rules. You’ll learn how she hopped a flight twice from her home in Denmark to London to interview for a position at global IT consulting firm Project Brokers that didn’t exist, reversed roles with her husband and morphed into the sole breadwinner for her family.  On a mission, Jeanne wanted to move from Europe and live in Toronto near her parents. One year later, she’s now opening up her new office in Canada.  Her career should be a case study highlighting that not just academics can get us to where we want to be, but also an

unyielding dogged faith in yourself when the voices in your head scream self-doubt.

My favorite quote from our interview: “Women can and do achieve much more than men. They are always more open to ideas”. Without further ado here’s the

inspiring interview with working mum of two, Jeanne Peterson.

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Subscribe here to In Our Shoes.

He said next time he’d bring his gear. I thought “Am I insane?“  Probably, but that never stopped me before. I’m talking plane jumping that is. Seems I’ve reached a new low or high depending on how you look at it..

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I work with an intriguing Oz man who blows into town every few months from our office in Melbourne. He barely talks about it really, but yet again with each work dinner I bring it up like a child who can’t wait to hear that one last bedtime story.

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So tell me all about it. What’s it like?  I ask yet again.

 

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When he’s not programming for us down under, my workmate from Australia is jumping out of planes professionally and I’ve just  signed myself up for my first jump in his care. (big gulp).

If I can skin and gut a rabbit with my bare hands for British royals,  this should be but a breeze.

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I meet with bff for dinner and drinks tonight; Manhattan is more fired up than ever. I tell her that I’m going to jump out of a plane.  I thought she’d shake me up and down, slap me silly or order me a stronger drink.  Instead she leans into the table, looks me square in the eye and says ”Can you take me with you?”

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We proceed to vent on how difficult it is at times, juggling it these days in the Big Apple as career women and parents in this economy. She the attorney, me the IT somebody and writer. Both of us just peaking in our careers. Out of college, it was smart and sexy to be wooed by Corporate America when we were single. We should have played dumb before settling down  – we laugh, reaching our usual “if only…” moment.

Working mothers don’t need more coffeee. What we need  is to jump out of planes.

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 Fabulous 2012 interview being delivered to you this week. You won’t want to miss it! 

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Subscribe here.

 

 

If you’ve been out of the job hunt for a while, you should know that the rules have changed in this competitive climate – on both sides of the Atlantic.  What follows doesn’t just apply to landing that next job. It’s also a wake up call that should scream: “this is the next move which will make me h-a-p-p-y“.

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Working in the financial services industry, I’ve given out lots of goodbye hugs in the last few years to close friends and colleagues. I learned what leading recruitment firms swear by, in order for you to stand out in this rocky job market. Here’s the inside scoop.

The questions you need to ask yourself are: Who am I? and What am I selling? 

You are your own brand. You need to manage yourself  like a company who sells a product because that’s exactly why a hiring manager is gracing you with their presence – to find out just how valuable a package you are. The only questions taped to their forehead are “Why should I hire you?” and “What makes you unique?”  

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Here comes the tough part. Write down all of the things that you do well – not just related to your specific job skills. Do you speak another language or play the guitar? Are you a good networker? Are you super organized? These talents are what you throw in as chit chat during the pregnant pauses of an interview which can turn it around if you feel it’s going south.

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I was told a priceless story from someone who knew he wasn’t hitting it off  with the person interviewing him. As he was getting ready to leave, he threw down his last card and mentioned he loved to cook. Turns out so did the hiring manager. They hit it off, the guy was hired and he shares that story with everyone to prove that it’s about your whole story and not just what’s on a piece of paper. Go back to my post on  Soft Sexy Skills for a read on how your magnetic personality can really turn the tables when landing a position. 

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You can also cheat by getting the skinny on anyone beforehand. Have a peek at their very public profile on Linked in. Here’s mine: http://www.linkedin.com/pub/marisa-santoro/6/a19/186  – all above board dear readers and arms you with what makes for great conversation.

 

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Create your banner ad

Think of this as your name blinking in bright lights. What makes you the star? Your banner ad is the first thing they should see at the top of your Resume / CV. Here’s what mine would look like:

Distinctive mix of Creative, Technical and Online Media Writing skills

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My career is rooted in technology but I’m also very creative and I’ve always been a writer. Much like branding a product to market, you emphasize why your story is different because in these times you can’t be perceived to be the same as everyone else. .

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Branding can mean a variety of things. It could be an online presence, a blog, you can be a subject matter expert in a certain area. Write down all of the things you did in your career and it will flow; just make sure it lands with a splash!

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Your 30 second elevator pitch

The  top one third of your resume is the most valuable piece of real estate – it’s your bio in a few sentences and it needs to back up your banner ad above. It should answer the question: “So, tell me your story?“  This brief summary of  Fabulous You, is your 30 second elevator pitch. It’s what you would throw out at cocktails when you’re getting warmed up in the name of good networking. 

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 Your 2 minute Commerical

Your 2 minute commercial is in the interview, your one shot to expand on all of this. Yep, you heard me. Two minutes is the golden rule; go on longer than that and they’ve hit the snooze button. Of most importance before your curtain closes and you’re about to exit the interview, you turn around and remind them (while humming the Rocky theme song)

why you can repeat your successes again, in your sleep. 

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Readers, I leave you with more Job Search Tips here.  

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 Questions? Open it up here as a conversation that everyone can benefit from in the just released In Our Shoes Forums.  No login required and you don’t need to leave your real name or email.  Just click Reply.

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<a href=”http://www.blogcatalog.com”>BlogCatalog</a>

There are three things that stop time for me in this life: passing a red door, music from the strings of a solo guitar and wandering pure ocean country. The first two I don’t have much control over, they appear randomly in unexpected moments. 

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The last one however was very much in reach.

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Find your fix as you welcome the New Year.

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Coming up in 2012, we meet more inspiring working moms and mums.

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Here’s the lineup. 

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Subscribe here. Comment below.

 

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If I’m too quiet at home, my son will check in and ask “Mummy, are you ok?”  (Peppa Pig is big in our house). I’ll answer with a short “Yep, I’m good.” followed by a big squeeze. I’ve become quite spoiled by my little man making sure I’m happy.

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This scene turns a bit sour however, if my mom is visiting. She’ll usually answer with:  ”No, she’s not ok. Your mom is definitely not normal!“. 

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Our tap dance then begins where she’ll lecture me on the life I lead. The one where I take on projects that have me travel to our Boston and Toronto offices. She’ll remind me of the weekend in Paris I took for a girlfriend getaway or how I drive too fast (maybe a half truth). I won’t mention London or my plans to hop the pond permanently one day.

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Generally, I  don’t really swallow judgement calls. But I will say this:

Our moms get credit for all they juggled as homemakers, but when it comes to our working mama lives, they haven’t a clue.

I’m a product of a Sicilian family raised in Brooklyn, New York. Mama spent her life devoted to one thing – the famiglia.  I get that raising my brothers was no easy feat – one a musician, the other a dabbler in all life had to offer. They were good bad boys. Yet today, I’ve somehow been branded the oddity. My family is  a supportive bunch but generally speaking, they don’t really get me. A typical welcome from my brothers will be: “So what are we blogging about today sis?” followed by snickers. (I believe they secretly await the call to corrupt me one day.)  .

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The deal is, if you’ve signed yourself up as a working mother, you either coast until you expire in this fragile economy or you step up and really make a go of it. I’ve spent almost two decades doing the work that I do. Travel and yes a satisfying social life come along for the ride. Everyone loves perks. If one tapped into the underground network of mommy guilt, you will find the break away from the home truly keeps us sane and hence makes for better mothers. It’s not just about the money.  One day my son will learn that in fact I’m very much the norm in this century and that (per big brother teasers) I’m quite a gem really.

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I leave you with a snippet from a book just scribed by UK writer Gaby Hinsliff. “..about the future of work and the massive changes in family life that are coming together now in one big bang.”

“Half a Wife: The Working Family’s Guide to Getting a Life Back”.

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“The impact of the so-called “second shift” done by women on top of work is a marital risk factor most couples go to the altar knowing little about. Young women prone to swooning that their boyfriend will be “a really great father” because he likes small children should learn to check instead how often he stacks the dishwasher, perhaps a better indicator of a man ready to share the routine daily work involved in family life.”

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Well said Gabs. Wish you’d released nine years ago, before I myself headed to the altar. You may very well lower the divorce rate around here. Wishing you much success with its release!

Next up: The “elevator pitch” and “your 2 minute commercial”. More to come….

Subscribe here, Comment below. 

There’s a well accepted learning theory referred to as the “Four Stages of Competency” as whispered in the orb of psychology.

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We all have a star we’re shooting for, a personal success mission that’s been lingering. Experts say, if you mosey on through each of these stages (below), you’re on your way towards this quest for success. That is, as long as you’re up for learning the skills to get you there. Roll with me on this one.

 Stage 1: Unconscious Incompetence

This is the stage where you have no inkling of how to do something and here’s the rub, you’re not even aware that you’re incapable. You rebuff  any value in learning a new skill in order to achieve success. This my dear readers is the scary stage, because you’re in denial. Until you accept its value and (ahem) your own incompetence, you’re unable to move onto Stage 2. 

 

Stage 2: Conscious Incompetence

Ahhh, now your eyes are wide open. You recognize that you don’t know how to do something but that it’s relevant to what you’re trying to achieve. You’ve turned a new leaf and are eager to keep falling off the bike until you learn the skill well.

 

Stage 3: Conscious Competence

You’re in the deep end of the pool. Not only do you know how to perform this skill, you’re now working on perfecting it. You’re in deep concentration but still taking baby steps to get there. Your game is on. 

Stage 4: Unconscious Competence

You have had so much practice that the skill is now ”second nature”; you can practically do it in your sleep. You’re even ready to start teaching others your wisdom!

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I’d say most of us give up somewhere around Stage 2 1/2. This talk is easier said than done. Life is never easy, but isn’t it fun to dig in once in a while and let it rip?

Find your passion, accept your failures and most of all -  enjoy it.

An Italian saying I love: “Nella vita – chi non risica – non rosica.” -  He who risks nothing, gains nothing.

One life, best to make  it a good one. 

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A toast to 2012. Salute!  [sah - loo - te].

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In a study conducted in the US and Europe interviewing senior managers across industries, it was asked what skills they value most in the people they hire. Turns out, it’s the soft skills that tip the scale unanimously.

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Time to get your sexy on. 

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You can be at the top of your game regardless of whether you’re a chef, research analyst or an accountant.  At the end of the day however, you’re valued on how professionally you cooked the roast, not on the rating of the heavenly five course meal you just whipped up.

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The Top Three hit list  of what skills are most desired by management: 

1. Leadership

2. Communication Skills

3. Personal Charisma / Persuasiveness

.Love it. I’ll also throw in my personal  #4 :

4. Quiet Confidence – never leave home without it.

 

 

Happy Holidays readers. New year. New possibility. New slate.  Cheers!

 

“Sometimes I get a good feeling. I get a feeling that I never never never never had before.” – Flo Rida

  

 While nothing can beat the surreal experience of slumbering in a British royal castle on camera, I must say being a part of   Meetup.com’s movie was just as fabulous. I loved the energy and creative vibe of this media village.

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  <<< ——- Entering Meetup’s global headquarters in NYC.

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It felt a little strange being on  the other  side of the table answering questions about my writer’s life. I’ve become quite used to doing the driving around here! Airs in January, excited about In Our Shoes getting some more “air time” in the media!

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 Tomorrow, stay tuned for my:

 ”Sexy Soft Skills” for career success (goes for gents as well)! 

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British working mums, that is. This just in from the UK’s Guardian news this morning:

Full story at: http://www.guardian.co.uk/money/2011/dec/11/free-childcare-millions-tax-mums - the very reason why In Our Shoes has turned its focus on:

Supporting working mums in the UK.

If free childcare comes to pass in Great Britain, this will be a game changer for women’s career advancement in the country. Interestingly, while the maternity benefits rock compared to what American moms get, doesn’t being out for a year leave a huge gap and risk to having potentially stale skillsets? I was out for a mere 3 months after pregnancy. It was difficult getting back into the swing and applying my technical acumen after being on baby brain for such a stretch. That, coupled with the isolation I felt being at home compared to the camraderie at work was a huge hurdle.

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More power to British women if free nursery takes effect. Speaking to the mums I met, the reason they opt out of going back to work is simple: child care costs and salary are a wash, so why bother?

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Just wrapped up two 6am interviews with extraordinary women in London and Denmark this week before hitting the road to the day job in New York’s concrete jungle.

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Did someone say sleep? I’ve forgotten what that is. I heart South American coffee!

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 More to come, Subscribe here.

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I’m not trying to be a film star. I”m the writer, I tell myself with each morning stretch. This week however, another film opportunity has surfaced and now I’m thinkin’ there’s something spooky going on. 

Do S....

Do Something.

Learn Something.

Share Something.

Change Something.

Meetup dot com learned of my  British royal film debut and asked if I would be in their upcoming Meetup Movie highlighting the amazing experiences and opps people have had through the use of their community site.  They go on to say I’m one of millions of members chosen for the production set to start filming in Manhattan’s Chelsea district next week. What’s there to think about?  I accepted on the spot and am thrilled to once more take part in such a rare opportunity.

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For those of you who haven’t caught the bug, global http://www.meetup.com/ is a powerful tool you can use to change your life.  It ranks right up there in  my “try something new” shoes. Whether you’d like to try  a new sport, learn a new language, create new relationships, it all boils down to one thing – networking and connections and this my dear readers are what the experts say keeps us smiling.

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Research has swirled around, proving people lead far happier and satisfied lives when they belong to a group.

I’ve joined kayaking meetups, italian speaking meetups, cooking meetups, funky-jazz-in-smokey-bar meetups  and any women connections meetup that rears its head in Manhattan. You meet different personalities that in any other circumstance you wouldn’t imagine you’d have anything in common with, until you the hit the Meetup scene. From a businesss point of view, there are tons of powerful network opportunity groups forming each day around the world. These guys got it right and it’s addictive. .

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Tomorrow I attend: “Coming out on Top of Change“, a leadership conference empowering women to manage and create change whilst working in the ever fluctuating financial services industry – all to be smuggled right back to you here.

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TGIF everyone.

 

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“I want something else, to get me through this life.” – Third Eye Blind 

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Manhattan skyscrapers evoke the “sky’s the limit” optimism, maybe that’s why we Americans come off as so upbeat? This week however, they weren’t oozing enough inspiration.

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Grabbed a girlfriend to join me in getting my Britannia fix in. My fave British haunt: Tea & Sympathy.  Owner Nicky Perry is a NY success story and working mum to a seven year old daughter. You know where I’m headed with this!

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Every woman who has contributed to this site via interview or story will respond to your query in the vein of inspiration or support. Reach out: Marisa@InRShoes.com.

In Our Shoes – the Working Women network. 

 I’m humbled to see the rising interest in In Our Shoes from UK subscribers. This week I’m excited to announce the launch of a site across the pond. 

InRShoes.co.uk  is now official and live.

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Stay tuned for my British working mum interview with someone who I must say has worn shoes I’ve never come close to trying on. Readers, I introduce you to woman warrior Danielle Curzon.

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Formally an international titleholder dressage rider, an international champion martial arts competitor, former bodyguard to Emma Watson and other celebrities, survivor of a miraculuous pregnancy with healthy baby girl (the one the medical experts said she’d never have) and is now a leading first female referee in the UK’s Mixed Martial Arts circuit at UCMMA Cage Rage..

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Oh and not to be swept under the rug, Danielle is also a daughter of British aristocracy, born to the noble Viscount Scarsdale. 

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More to come on her astounding story!

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In other news, check out the not so surprising recent headline from The Economist (it stings just the same):

Closing the gap: Women have made huge progress in the workplace, but still get lower pay and far fewer top jobs than men.

Lots coming up this month including more advice on the job hunt. Rocky financial forecast ahead in the States and overseas. The resume/CV as we know it has been revamped – I’ll have lots of tips to get you prepared, the interview game has changed. Feel free to email me any questions.

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Wonderful weekend everyone, be well.

 

 

 

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